You're Asking the Wrong Question About Your Calling

Have you ever wondered, "What is my purpose?"

Maybe that's the wrong question.

In this episode of Seriously, Sis Podcast, we unpack what the Bible actually says about purpose, calling, and God's will. While every believer shares the same ultimate purpose - to know Christ and make Him known - the way we live that out looks different in every season of life.

Some people seem to know their calling from a young age. Others spend decades wondering where God is leading them. But whether your next step feels crystal clear or completely uncertain, one thing remains true: God is looking for hearts that are willing to obey Him wherever He leads.

In this episode, we discuss:

The difference between purpose and calling
Why comparing your journey to others is dangerous
What to do if you don't know your calling
Why obedience matters more than certainty
How God often changes our assignments through different seasons
Living faithfully before you have all the answers

Check us out!

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YouTube: @SeriouslySisPodcast

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Walking in God's purpose sometimes is walking in the things you don't want to do.

SPEAKER_02 0:04

Right.

SPEAKER_00 0:05

Like my very brief stint in being involved in politics. Hated that. Hated everything about that. Learned a lot.

SPEAKER_01 0:15

Right.

SPEAKER_00 0:15

Got to meet a lot of people. Got to grow. Got to share. Great. Do I feel like I was in the will of the Lord being a part of that? Yes, I do. Do I want to do it again? No, I don't.

SPEAKER_01 0:33

Hey, hey, it's Seriously Sist Podcast, and welcome back. This week we're going to be talking through what if you don't know your purpose?

SPEAKER_00 0:43

So I want to ask you, what would be your response to someone if they said, Madison, I don't know what my purpose is?

SPEAKER_01 0:50

I would say I think we all have the same goal and objective, and that is to go into all the world and preach the gospel of Jesus Christ.

SPEAKER_00 1:00

And then when they look at you and say, Yeah, yeah, I know that, but like, I don't know what my purpose is, then what do you say to them?

SPEAKER_01 1:09

We all have the same purpose, and it is to go into all the world and preach the gospel of Jesus Christ.

SPEAKER_00 1:18

I ask it like that because I knew your answer was going to be exactly the same.

unknown 1:22

Sorry.

SPEAKER_01 1:24

I think that that should be very clear. I think, I think that people get so drawn into what is my my destiny? What am I supposed to be doing? And I do think that the way you carry about the purpose is different per person. I do think it changes, but at the end of the day, we do have one goal.

SPEAKER_02 1:43

Right.

SPEAKER_01 1:43

And one purpose. And when you start putting other purposes above that purpose, things get out of alignment. We have one objective, and that is to go into all the world and preach the gospel and bring people to know Jesus. If you're a parent, you have a goal, teach your kids about Jesus. So then they can go and teach people. Right? There's a reason we're supposed to be fruitful and multiply. Teach these people and release them. Um there's one goal, one objective.

SPEAKER_00 2:14

I I think, I think, you know, it's it's a fine question to ask. Like, you know, I want to know, like, what am I gonna do in this life? I think is really what people are getting.

SPEAKER_02 2:24

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 2:25

You know, like, what am I gonna do? Like, what's gonna be my occupation? Am I gonna fulfill my dreams? You know, all of these things. And there's nothing wrong with asking that question, um, you know, in and of itself, but I will say that the things that are high up on God's priority list and the things that are high up on ours are not always the same thing. We're not aligned. Not always. And so I agree with you. The purpose of every Christian, the purpose of every person really, is just whether or not you choose to go with that purpose, is to, like you said, go and and preach the gospel. And I agree with you that there are different uh ways in which we will do that. But I think it's um, I think it's a a dangerous thing sometimes whenever, like, like what if somebody was to answer that question and say, your purpose is to go live in a hut and you're gonna go preach the gospel in Zimbabwe, and you have no desire for that. You are not the evangelist street corner preacher, like you're not designed for that. I think when we get so like tunnel vision, unless the Lord is giving you a specific, you know, call or something like that, but when we get so tunnel vision, we can miss how God can use us in any circumstance and we can put ourselves in the wrong one.

SPEAKER_01 3:45

Right. And I think that's a podcast in itself. So I'm not gonna try to get too deep into it, but goes into discernment and you letting people speak things into your life that people have their own agendas, man. And sometimes they don't even have their own agendas. Sometimes they're they genuinely want what's best for you. Sure. And they push on you what they think is best for you, not what the Lord told them is best, but when they're looking from from an outsider's point of view, this is what seems best for this person. So the Lord is this has to be their calling and purpose and what they're supposed to do. And like I said, I'm not gonna go too deep into that because we totally should talk on that. Um but uh I think that you will know when you're walking in, I don't want to say the purpose that God called you to, but when you're walking where God's calling you to walk. You know, I've had some instances in my life where I knew that God called me to a place. And when I got there, I saw his hands all over my life. I saw everywhere, every corner, every second I saw him there. I knew that in that moment, that was where he wanted me to be. That was my purpose in that moment. Um, so I think when you're you start getting in the word and you get with the Lord and you start making that walk with him, you'll know because he may, he's he's not a secretive God. I know everyone thinks he is. Like he's not speaking to me, he's not talking to me, he's just, I'm just by myself out here. But he really isn't. When you're walking with him and you're doing what he asks you to do, you just see the fruits. You just see it it all, you see it everywhere. So, I mean, and some of the times when you're walking in those places, maybe you don't feel like it's making a big impact.

unknown 5:38

Right.

SPEAKER_01 5:38

It doesn't feel like a big purpose. Like, I think all of us have a desire to be remembered. Like one day we're all gonna die. Yeah, and we're gonna go to heaven. And I think we're concerned when we leave this place. Who's gonna come to your funeral? We think about those things. Like, who's gonna show up? Will I have anyone come? So I don't think it's more so uh not knowing your purpose. I think it's like we tie this to our value. Like, do I have enough value? Am I doing enough in order to be remembered?

SPEAKER_00 6:16

Right. I think the um, I think this is also true, which is the flip side of what I posed before, which you said is a topic in and of itself. Sometimes we want people to tell us the thing we want to be our purpose. Right. Like, I love music, therefore I want my purpose to be. This is hypothetical, but I want my purpose to be ministering in music. And that may be, you know, a way that the Lord wants to use you, but it may also not be.

SPEAKER_02 6:47

Right.

SPEAKER_00 6:48

And I think sometimes we we get hyper focused on a vision or a goal or something that we want, which is nothing wrong with that in and of itself. But when that becomes something that you can't let go of if God calls you to go in a different direction, even if that direction is just for a season, um, that's more so about what you want to do your way, and not necessarily about what God's purpose is for your life. I think another aspect of that is sometimes when we ask, like, what's my purpose? I think we think about that in terms of like from this moment until the day I die, like, what is the thing I'm gonna be doing? But if you've been walking with Jesus for any like significant amount of time, you know we go through seasons of things. So, you know, going back to the music analogy, I love to sing, I love to do music. I'm very involved in it right now, but there was a season of time when I was not. And but I very much felt like now looking back on it, I was in the will of the Lord, and it was in my purpose in that season of time for what he had to do in me and for what he was doing through me. Even though to be completely honest, it wasn't nothing I wanted to do. So, like, I think we get this understanding of, or we want somebody to tell us what our purpose is, like we want somebody to be a fortune teller, like what we're gonna be doing and how grand is it gonna be, and am I gonna be remembered for X, Y, and Z? When really, if you're wanting to know what your purpose is, yes, it is to go and make Jesus known, but it's also to be obedient to him wherever he calls you.

SPEAKER_01 8:26

Yeah, that's exactly right.

SPEAKER_00 8:28

Yeah, that's the purpose of your life, and that's the part that we don't like to hear because when somebody comes to you, especially if they already got it made up in their mind what they want to hear, and you say, it is to be obedient to Jesus wherever he calls you, probably not the answer they were looking for.

SPEAKER_01 8:46

Yeah, I think um you're spot on. I think that people need validation in order for them to do anything. Um, I don't know why we're like that. It's like, surely, if God's calling me to do this, he'll send me a sign. Somewhere, someone will tell me that this is it. Isn't it when he say it? Yeah, even when he says it's like uh maybe. I also do believe that, you know, if God gives you any talent or God gives you um a desire, there's a reason he put that there. So, like your desire for music, do I think you're called to do worship and worship him in whatever capacity he has that at? Absolutely. Why in the world we allow you to sing the way you sing if he didn't want you to sing to him? Sure. Just it wouldn't make any sense. In the same sense, I think sometimes we we jump into trying to do something because we like the way it looks, pull ourselves into someone else's lane. Okay, they're finding a lot of fruit from that. They're finding a lot of success from that. Let me go do that. I wasn't called to be a preacher. So I would never. But I think it's cool when I like see them do it, and I'm like, yeah, that's awesome. Like that, but I would not jump up on the stage and be like, guys, today I'm Pastor Madison coming to preach you just something, right?

SPEAKER_00 10:01

I hope you know what that something is. You get ready to preach to that.

SPEAKER_01 10:04

No, I didn't, but we're gonna talk about something. I would stutter my words. I just know. You know, sometimes you just it's crazy. Sometimes we know so for sure what God did not call us to do.

SPEAKER_02 10:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 10:16

There are some things that we just know. The Lord did not call me to be a part of that ministry. I know for a fact he didn't. If you can't cook, he didn't call you to go work in the kitchen. Like, you you know for a fact God didn't call me to this.

SPEAKER_00 10:28

I feel like you specifically wanted to say that.

SPEAKER_01 10:31

No.

SPEAKER_00 10:32

Like you're just dropping some little hints at people. If you can't cook, don't serve in the kitchen on Sunday. But go ahead.

SPEAKER_01 10:39

I mean, don't you can serve in the kitchen, but don't volunteer to make the whole meal or any of the meal. Just sit back and watch and learn something. That's just my thought process. Um, but we're so aware of what we're not called to. I'm so aware that that ministry is not for me, right? We hear a lot of the times that people uh talk about teachers and they're like, I can never do that. Bless your heart, you know, you're a saint. I would never be able to teach middle schoolers. I'm so aware that I cannot handle children, you know, or or whatnot. But when it's the things that we are called to, that God's placed in us, that we know he's placed these desires in us, we either think we're foolish because someone told us we were dumb to think that he would ever pick someone like you to do that. I don't know how many times I felt foolish to want something.

SPEAKER_02 11:30

Sure.

SPEAKER_01 11:30

Um, or we doubt ourselves, like, surely not me, or I can't do that. I'm I possibly cannot. I had no problem saying no to the other thing, but the thing he's telling you to say yes to and walk into, we're double guessing or checking ourselves. So if that's what we consider purpose, yeah, I think that we miss the mark a couple times.

SPEAKER_00 11:54

Yeah, and you know, I think both can be true at the same time. I think it can absolutely be that, you know, I do believe that the Lord gives gifts on purpose for a reason. It does not mean that you're gonna be selling out stadiums, but I do believe that he gives gifts for a reason, mostly for his glory, right? But um, but I I do believe that the opposite can also be true. And and I tried to keep this in my mind so that I never say what I won't do, because I've learned that when I say that, the Lord makes me do it. So I'm trying to change my language, but um, going back to the kids' ministry, I am one of those people. I am one of those people who said, This is not my calling, and it isn't. Like it's not. I love kids, but that's just not my area of expertise. But I found in my life that the things that I feel like I'm not qualified to do.

SPEAKER_01 12:46

It's so funny because all my kids really love her. Like, really love her. Actually, the other day, my youngest um was faking like I didn't tell her this, but she was faking like she was on a phone call. And you know who she was talking to? She was talking to Julia. Whoa! Hey Julia, hey Julia.

SPEAKER_00 13:06

See, but that's my buddy. You have well-behaved kids. It's different.

SPEAKER_01 13:10

She's not good with kids. Or she doesn't, and I'm like, my kids think she's the greatest.

SPEAKER_00 13:15

That's because you have well-behaved kids. I guess I should make a little addendum. I'm not good with unruly kids. Not everybody raises their kids the same, but that's a different podcast. But my point is that walking in God's purpose sometimes is walking in the things you don't want to do. Right. Like my very brief stint in being involved in politics, hated that, hated everything about that, learned a lot, right, got to meet a lot of people, got to grow, got to share. Great. Do I feel like I was in the will of the Lord being a part of that? Yes, I do. Do I want to do it again? No, I don't. So when you talk about your purpose, you've just got to be open to wherever God is leading you season by season.

SPEAKER_03 14:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 14:05

You know, because again, He's giving me, He's giving me a gift, He's given you a gift. But we both have gone through seasons of time and we were not utilizing that gift, at least not in the way that we want it to be, right? Did he make provision for us to do that later? Yes, he did. I do believe he gives gifts for a reason. But when you're talking about your purpose, I think we need to change the my to his. Like instead of asking, what is my purpose? I think we should be asking, what is his purpose for my life? Because then that makes us open to whatever he's calling us in whatever moment. I have no idea what I'm going to be doing five years from now. Now, I have a five-year plan because I believe that you should make a plan. But there is room for the Lord to pivot me because I've seen it don't always go the way that I planned it. Um, and I think that we need that in order to fully be in his will. Because to your point, we are called to go and to share the gospel. Some people that's gonna be on the other side of the world. Some people that's gonna be in your office break room.

SPEAKER_01 15:19

That's right.

SPEAKER_00 15:20

You just you don't know where that's gonna be or how you're gonna do it. Just be open to the Lord to go. And if he gives you a gift, if he gives you a vision, then move forward. If he hasn't given you a vision as of right now, just stay tuned. I guarantee you, if you stay in his will, he will. And I think that's what people, where people are, especially young people, when they're asking that question of what's my purpose, is just because they haven't gotten the vision of what the season is yet. But to your point, uh, he wants you to go share the gospel. Yeah, he's going to give you that. Just know that he's faithful to show you and show up and you just keep pursuing him. What your purpose is, is to pursue God. And as you pursue him, he will order your footsteps. Um, he will give you the direction. You just have to be open to it. But you can absolutely waste a whole bunch of time trying to chase after something with everything inside of you. And that's not his will for your life.

SPEAKER_01 16:22

No, it's it's you really do have to get uh an ear to to hear him and listen to him and know that he's telling you something. When you were talking about how you can waste a lot of time when I was thinking about it, I'm gonna use an analogy. Um, I have a teenage daughter, and um when she brought her first boyfriend home and I met him, I remember thinking this isn't going to go anywhere. Now, she wasted a lot of time. I already knew it wasn't gonna go anywhere because I was I was in tune, I was paying attention, I could see the signs, this isn't gonna go well. But she allowed other influences to take her somewhere else to where she wasted all this time doing, well, dating this guy. And at the end of it, there was heartbreak, there was emotional immaturity, all the things. Um, and I when I think about like wasting time, if you let people pull you into their priorities and what they think is right for your life, and sometimes it's not even what they think is right for their life, what they need from you.

SPEAKER_00 17:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 17:34

I had to learn that when I was in Bible school. I remember um I got asked to help at uh a conference, and I was told uh, hey, I saw your music online, which I was very confused because I was like, there's music of mine online. Oh my gosh, what? Um but I saw I saw some of your your stuff online, and um God put you on my heart to come and speak at this conference. I said, okay. And when I got to the conference, I was like, ain't no way I was supposed to be singing at this conference, not speak, sorry. No way I was supposed to be singing at this conference. Like, well, and um it was like I felt like I was constantly being pulled to go do music here, go do music here, go help here. And I felt the Lord at some point tell me, you cannot make yourself available to everything. Or it will distract you and pull you before what from what I want you to do. You cannot do everything.

SPEAKER_02 18:24

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 18:24

Some of us want to do it all because it feels nice to be needed. We all want to be needed.

SPEAKER_02 18:30

Yeah, we do.

SPEAKER_01 18:31

But if you find yourself in a place where you're struggling to figure out your purpose, so you're just trying to wear all the hats, you'll miss out. Like you're you'll miss out. Um, something's going to suffer. It's just inevitable. You can't do everything. I mean, at least I can't, and I'm pretty good at doing a lot of things at one time. Contrary to what Julia says, I'm pretty good at it.

SPEAKER_00 18:54

Um she's good at doing a lot of things except the things I ask her to do.

SPEAKER_01 18:58

Except paying attention and listening.

SPEAKER_00 19:00

See, I wasn't even gonna say that.

SPEAKER_01 19:02

Yeah, but um you anyways, so you will find yourself uh being tired, worn out. Ministry can be very exhausting um if you you let people use and abuse you and pull you.

unknown 19:21

Yep.

SPEAKER_01 19:22

A purpose can be a lot of things.

SPEAKER_00 19:23

Something I've learned to do in general, and and and when I say learn to do, I mean like I've done it in the last week, is periodically stopping and asking God, am I where you want me to be? I have my hands in a lot of things right now. A lot. And they're all for the most part good things. But I still stop and ask God, have I picked this up, whatever it may be, all of these things, have I picked them up because I wanted to pick them up, or did I pick them up because I felt like you were calling me to do it? And you have to be open to asking God that. And then whatever He shows you, follow that. And there's nothing wrong with asking that question. Sometimes you'll ask that question and it'll be, no, this is exactly where you know I need to be. And then sometimes you'll ask that question and find, no, I just saw the shiny pretty thing over there, and I really liked it, and it was available. So I just took it, you know, and now I have 35 different things that I'm juggling and wonder why it's not working.

SPEAKER_03 20:32

Right.

SPEAKER_00 20:32

Um, so but everybody, whether the thing that you're managing is going perfectly, or the things that you're managing are, you know, you feel like you're dropping every ball you have, you need to be asking God that because of two things. One, it shows your humility that you will allow God to pivot you if he needs to pivot you. And two, it means that you're really concerned about what he wants more than just what you want. And again, there's nothing wrong with wanting things. The word does say that he gives us the desires of our hearts. But when what you want is above what he is trying to accomplish, that's a problem. And sometimes we can get any of us, myself or I am the leader of that, can get that out of order. Um, so ask yourself that, you know, as you're going through things. Is this, and I don't mean ask it in an anxiety-inducing way.

SPEAKER_01 21:25

Right.

SPEAKER_00 21:26

That's not what I'm saying. Don't be paranoid about it, but just ask and give God the space to be able to show you whether or not that's where um he wants you, because he will. Right. Because he wants you to be in his will. And he's a good dad. So if you're stepping outside of it, but you're you're sharing your heart with him to say, God, I don't want to be outside of it, put me back inside of your will, he will. He will do that. Um, but don't have to have all the answers all the time. Right. You know, there's I'm I'm a person who likes to know the end from the beginning.

SPEAKER_01 22:00

Oh, I know.

SPEAKER_00 22:01

I just do. Like, that's just something I'm working on. And there have been a lot of things that I've stepped into with that mindset, knowing that I'm completely unqualified to do it. But being fully aware of the fact that God wanted me to do it and I stepped into it anyway. So don't always need to know the end from the beginning. Sometimes we're asking what our purpose is because we're afraid to take a step because we don't know how it's going to pan out.

SPEAKER_01 22:28

Right.

SPEAKER_00 22:30

Don't always need to know the end from the beginning. If he's called you there, he will give you provision to go through it.

SPEAKER_01 22:35

And sometimes God will call you to things and you do drop the ball. And things don't work out. And it doesn't look the way it's supposed to look, but you learn a lot in your failures. I've seen a lot of people, and I've been in positions in my life that I knew God called me to it. And when I started doing it, I was like, what am I doing here? Like, who agreed to allow me to do this? I have no idea what I'm doing. I have no, and I didn't think I was very good at it either. I was like, I don't think this is one of my strengths. Lord, I don't really know why you gave me this opportunity. Um, because I don't got it. I don't got it. And I stayed. And I learned and I took time. And it taught me things that I honestly, naturally, I just wasn't things I was good at. Administrative things, things that I normally would be like, put it on the back burner, I'm not worried about it. It taught me those things. And I hated every minute of it. I was like, this is crap. I don't know why anybody would want to do this job. This is a disaster. And I was apparently doing a great job. Madison, you're really good. Like we really like it. And I'm like, this is horrible. This is not good. And I just felt like I was failure after failure after failure. I knew God brought me this opportunity. Um, but I just felt so out of place. But I learned some skills and I learned some things that I would have never picked up. I would have never learned them. They went against my natural nature to do 19 things at once and just, you know, make it happen. Like to slow down, not need validation of anything, and work a job that was there was no greater scale on if I was doing well or wasn't doing well. And I think for me, that was crazy because in my job, you know, we know when we're doing good. I know when I'm killing it. You kind of get those kudos and you just know that's not what there was. There was no grading scale. I was just doing a job. And it I was struggling. And at the end of it, I was like, oh gosh, look at all the skills I learned. Because God called me to do that. Had nothing to do with anything that I thought I was going to be doing. Didn't have to do with music, didn't have to do with uh what I do currently for work, didn't have to do with my niches and what I'm good at, had to do with none of that. But the skills I learned in that season were skills I would have never learned in any of my other niches. And now it's skills that I have brought with me into church. I brought into ministries to help organize and get ministries where they need to be. Because in that season, that was what God called me to that purpose. Why? I don't know. Well, I do know why, because he wanted to teach me some things. But I didn't like it while I was there.

SPEAKER_02 25:23

Right.

SPEAKER_01 25:25

I had many days I maybe cried. I can't remember.

SPEAKER_00 25:28

Um that memory of yours, we need to work on it.

SPEAKER_01 25:32

But sometimes just because you're in something, if God calls you to it and you're in it and you feel out of place and it feels like it's not working out, things aren't going well, people are giving you issues. There's something to learn.

SPEAKER_02 25:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 25:44

If he called you there, there's something to learn. I've worked under horrible bosses. I said, look, they know why you called me to work under this person. And I tell you, I learned more watching a bad boss do something they're not supposed to do. It taught me not to talk to people a certain way. Because I can be harsh. Oh man, I don't ever want to come off like that. The Lord was showing me something. Every time I've worked for someone who was not, I don't want to say good, was not the kind of leader I want to be. That's what I'll say. Not gonna say they're bad leaders, everyone to each their own people lead it different ways, but I could identify things that I don't want to make people feel like this. I don't want to make people see if feel or behave like this, or I don't want to make people feel unvalued. He was teaching me something. I was supposed to be there for that time, and I needed to learn something. And I took that with me to the next place so that I can make an impact.

SPEAKER_00 26:41

Right. Right. No, that's good. I am what I'm hearing in all of this is that flexibility is really the answer. What is my purpose in life? To be flexible with the Lord and allow him to be able to take you wherever he wants to take you, both for your sake and for the sake of those around you. Because what you just said about being under um questionable leadership. Yeah, that was good for you, but it's also good for anybody that you lead.

SPEAKER_02 27:15

Right.

SPEAKER_00 27:16

Because they then get a leader who is leading with the understanding of what it's like to be led. So it's not just about us sometimes either, in that. So flexibility to let the Lord uh take you to the places that he needs to take you to develop you, both for yourself and what he wants to do in you, but also for others and what he wants to do through you. That's why I'm saying when somebody, I think from now on, if somebody asks me that question, that's gonna be my response. Uh two things we need to change that question. What is his purpose for my life?

SPEAKER_01 27:56

Right.

SPEAKER_00 27:56

And number two, that you be flexible to be used in whatever way he wants to use you for the Great Commission.

SPEAKER_01 28:06

I love that. Don't let other people determine how God can use you.

SPEAKER_00 28:12

Don't let you determine.

SPEAKER_01 28:14

That's a big one. Don't let you determine. You know, I think about people who audition to be like on the worship team and things like that. And sometimes they get up there and they're like, oh, you know, I feel like God's calling me to this, but I didn't think I'd ever be able to do this. If I went to elevation and I went and auditioned for elevation's worship team, I wouldn't do that. But let's say I did. Um, I'm not sure if I'd make it or not. I'd hope I would, but probably not. Um there are levels of skills that everybody has because there are sizes and levels of church all around the world. Just because you weren't called to be on elevation stage doesn't mean you weren't called to be on rockfish stage.

SPEAKER_02 28:55

Right.

SPEAKER_01 28:56

Right? And just because you weren't called to be at rockfish stage doesn't mean that you weren't called to be at manna stage.

SPEAKER_02 29:01

Right.

SPEAKER_01 29:01

There are everyone has different talents. If I graded the way I sing based off the way Julia sings, I wouldn't sing. I just give up. Throw my hands up.

SPEAKER_02 29:11

We can never sing this at this point.

SPEAKER_01 29:14

Um but if you always are trying to grade what God can call you to based off of how good someone else is doing it, or how sometimes I think we put people on pedestals, we don't even know how good we are. I've heard some people audition and they're like, I'm okay, and then they start singing, and I'm like, this person, you gotta be kidding me. There's no way. Um, we often uh we hyper focus on certain people and we'll put them on a higher platform, like, oh, they can do it, but I cannot. I'm not gifted enough, talented enough, deserving enough. I know all the things I've done wrong in my life, so surely God's not gonna call me to do that. I know that I suck at X, Y, and Z, so why would He ever call me to this? You don't know what they suck at.

SPEAKER_02 30:00

Right.

SPEAKER_01 30:00

You don't know what their issues are. You don't know what they walked through. You don't know their testimony. You may know bits and pieces.

SPEAKER_02 30:07

Sure.

SPEAKER_01 30:07

Most people don't tell you all the skeletons in their closet.

SPEAKER_02 30:09

No.

SPEAKER_01 30:10

You may know yours. I don't know all Julia's mess. Julia knows everything about me.

SPEAKER_00 30:17

Anyway, keep going with your point.

SPEAKER_01 30:19

What I'm saying is don't stop thinking that God can call you to a purpose because you've messed up, because you're not on the same level as someone else, that you don't feel like you're spiritually on the same level as someone else. That you don't feel like you you're deserving. So we are our own worst critic. We stop ourselves more than anyone else.

SPEAKER_00 30:42

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 30:42

Do you know how many times I cried and said, God, I don't know why you put the desire for me to sing in my heart? I cannot do this. I cannot sing. She's a liar. Anyways, I like you don't know how many times I was put on stages and I knew God called me to be there. And they would put a song in a key that I don't know who sings in this key, Mariah Carey, maybe someone up there. And I would get done and I'd be so upset. And I'd be like, God, I remember being in my car one time after I sang this horrible song called Cornerstone. Um in whatever key it was in, it was a horrible key. It was way too high. And I got out and I got in my car. I knew God called me there. And I said, God, I cannot do this. And I was crying. I was like, God, why give me a desire that I cannot do? I physically can't do this. Like, why are you putting this on me and I can't do it? Like, why would you do this to me? I'm upset, crying. I'm just, I feel frustrated. I feel like horrible. And then the director for that team comes up to me and she says, Madison, when the person that was putting the set together asked me if a female could sing this song in this key, I said, Yes. But I had no idea it was you. And I just sat there and I was like, okay, it wasn't me. It was the song was too high. But I literally was, I was gonna quit. I was gonna quit um Bible school. I wasn't gonna do worship anymore. I was done with it. God, I don't know what you are thinking, but we are not on the same page, clearly. My vocal cords are not on the same page. Like I was ready to quit, walk away because someone made a decision that I don't think was malicious in any way. Sure. They just didn't know they sing like a dude. They had no idea that they were missing like a dude with Marquise, and they had no clue what was going on. And they thought, you know, I sang really high. And I didn't say anything. And I was like, okay, you know, maybe I can do this. And then I did it. I said, I cannot do. I almost quit.

SPEAKER_02 32:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 32:49

And what if I would have? What if I would have quit Bible school, said, you know what? Forget it. I'm gonna quit Bible school. God clearly didn't call me this. I'm smoking something because this was not it. And I would have just hung up the towel because one time I failed at something or I didn't do well. It didn't sound good. I didn't like the way it sounded. If every time I failed, I just said, this can't be what God's calling me to. This doesn't work. I wouldn't be here today. I don't even know if I would have ever, I would have never auditioned to be on the Rockfish worship team. I know that for a fact. If that was the case.

SPEAKER_00 33:23

Yeah, this podcast wouldn't exist. This podcast wouldn't exist.

SPEAKER_01 33:26

Yep. I wouldn't have auditioned Julia. Like maybe my husband and me wouldn't have got back together. Who knows what the trickle or what do they call it?

SPEAKER_02 33:34

The butterfly effect.

SPEAKER_01 33:35

Is that what it's called? Isn't there a movie about that? Okay. Who knows what it would be? But I'm just saying, be if God calls you to something, just because it's difficult, and you know he called you to it.

SPEAKER_02 33:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 33:46

Just because it's difficult, just because other people say you can't do it, maybe you try to do it and you fail. Maybe you're embarrassed like me, and you're like, what's wrong with this picture? Does not give you the right to walk away.

SPEAKER_02 34:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 34:00

God's not calling you to come and leave at your leisure. He's calling you to stay there until he tells you otherwise.

SPEAKER_00 34:05

Exactly.

SPEAKER_01 34:06

Plant yourself.

SPEAKER_00 34:07

When you were talking about auditions, you know, very often we are the ones who are conducting the auditions, right? We're not the ones doing the, like we're not the auditione. And something that I keep in mind being the the auditioner is never to have the mindset that someone is not called to it just because I either don't necessarily care for their voice or it wasn't a fit for this stage. Because who am I to tell someone what they're called to, what God has called them to? And I think anyone in their pos in that kind of position, whether it's music related or whatever, needs to be very careful about that because the words and the things that we say carry weight. Um, you know, to your point, you could say that and completely crush somebody, you know, and keep them from the call that God had, because maybe the key of that song just was not good for that person. And but now they don't ever want to sing again, and they're not gonna go to the congregation God meant for them to be in and do what he called them to do. So there's a level of responsibility and weight that we carry. Um, but I've had similar experiences, you know. Contrary to Madison's view of my voice, um, there have been many a times where I have been in rooms and literally felt like the weakest link in the room. Um and like I said, there was a long period of time where I wasn't singing at all.

SPEAKER_01 35:34

That's a very big room, very strong room.

SPEAKER_00 35:37

There's been a long period of time where I wasn't singing at all. And and you know, I and then on top of that, I'm a woman whose voice sits in a lower register anyway. If you guys think that I've never been um insecure about my voice, you're wrong. And and there's been times where I'm just like, why am I even doing this? Like, am I am I even good at this? Like, maybe I just should do something else. Maybe I should find something else to do. There have people, there have been people who looked at me and said, I can tell by the way that you talk that you can't sing. Just completely deflating kind of things. But it was funny, and I'm kind of going off, I know. But there was a period of time where I had this recurring dream, and it would be different scenarios, different situations. Um, but always in the dream there was something, it was like something was stuffed in my mouth, like like bread, or you know, just something that was keeping me from singing, and I um, or keeping me from speaking, actually. And I was trying to like get whatever it was out so that I could verbalize, but it was like every time I would open up my mouth to do it, um, I wasn't able to speak. And I had that dream for like a couple years. And then um I finally got the revelation of it one time when I stepped into the politics thing. The Lord was like, the enemy wants to silence your voice, but the only one who can allow him to do that is you. If you stop trying to speak, he will win. And after that, after that period, which is not singing, it's speaking, but after that period of time, I stopped having that dream and haven't had that dream since. So it was confirmation to me that regardless of my level of skill or you know, how eloquent I think I am or the lack thereof, that there's something in my voice that the Lord wants to utilize for his glory, not for me, right, but for his glory. And if I stop doing it, I will be out of his will. That's my purpose. So my purpose in that season was to use my voice in a different way. It was to use my voice to advocate for, I do love babies, I really do. I just don't need to be in the preschool to use my voice for for children and keeping them safe and for things that were unrighteous, speaking out against those things, to use my voice in that season. Now it's a new season. And you've got to be equally as flexible to allow God to use you however he wants to use you. So in this season, he's using my voice to sing. In the next season, he might make me be quiet altogether and sit. I don't know. But I'm open to whatever he wants because I've learned that um, if I'm open to what he wants, then I'm exactly where he wants me to be. And I'm in his will and I'm in my purpose. It's when I start trying to do things my own way, that I'm outside of what he wants, and then I got all these questions about my purpose. Every season isn't fun, but to your point, you can find wisdom or you can learn from every season if you just stay the course, because every season is also temporary.

SPEAKER_01 38:41

So then my question is this since we already know what purpose is, I think y'all should have figured that out at the first 10 seconds of this. If I ask you, what would you say to someone if they're trying to identify the season that they're in and if they're where they're supposed to be planted in that moment? What are some things that you would say to look for and listen for and notice to help you identify that?

SPEAKER_00 39:09

That's a good question. I wish you would ask me this off camera so I could have thought about it a little bit more. I would ask them to consider the things that are um put very deeply inside of them. Like the thing that it just seems like even when you want to run away from it, it finds you.

SPEAKER_01 39:26

Right.

SPEAKER_00 39:26

That pay attention to that because to your point, God put that in you for a reason. You have that deep desire for a reason. How you steward it might look a little different depending upon the season. But if it's in you like that, God has probably called you to it. He doesn't do anything by mistake. So I would pay attention to those things. I wouldn't just cast them aside. But I would also ask them to ask themselves, they don't have to tell me, but ask yourself honestly if God asked you to do something that was opposite of the thing that you want, would you still do it? Because if the answer is no, then that means that he doesn't have your full surrender and I would start there. But if he doesn't have your full surrender, he can't take you even to the places that you may want to go because you won't do it his way.

SPEAKER_01 40:20

That's yeah, that's true.

SPEAKER_00 40:22

So that's what I would say. What would you say?

SPEAKER_01 40:25

I'm thinking uh before I asked that question, I was thinking like, if you find yourself consistently like in this circle where certain opportunities keep happening, keep happening, keep happening. Maybe you're running from them, that might be the Lord sprinkling those things in your life, trying to get you to commit, trying to get you to go for it. Um, I think about like for work, there's I don't like public speaking. I think I've made that very clear. But there was a season in my life where God put me in places where I had to lead groups of 50 people, and I had to lead these people that were way higher paid than me, way higher on the totem pole than I am. And I was the one that had to direct and lead these people. And um, it was really uncomfortable, but those opportunities kept happening over and over and over again. And then one day I just had this moment with God, and it was like he was trying to prepare me to be able to speak in large groups when necessary. Now I've never had to do that, I still haven't had to do that, but it is a skill that he's working in me for whatever reason. Don't do that to me, Lord. But um, but sometimes, you know, I feel like the Lord will put things in front of you multiple times, multiple instances. And it is him trying to get you where you're supposed to be. Don't be a Jonah in the well and him have to like take you to Nineveh and then you just don't want to listen. I sure he smelled horrible. Um I'm sorry, Jonah and the big fish. I don't want to get Julia mad. I don't want to get her mad.

SPEAKER_00 42:05

What gets mad at that, not me?

SPEAKER_01 42:07

Don't it's not just him. Like we always pick on him in the Bible, but there were a lot, right? That didn't do what they what he asked of them. And some of them you have some stories where they didn't do what he asked of them, and he still gave them opportunity and chance, but it just took years for them to get there.

SPEAKER_00 42:22

Right, exactly. I agree.

SPEAKER_01 42:24

It's not too late. If you feel like God still has that desire in your heart, and you maybe passed up opportunity and chance, or maybe you chose you wanted to do something of the world, and that seemed more important to you at the time, um, it's not too late to go and preach the gospel.

SPEAKER_02 42:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 42:42

And it's it's not too late to get plugged in. If the desire is still in you, there's somewhere to plug in and do it.

SPEAKER_00 42:48

Exactly. And I feel like there's one category of people that we haven't really spoken to, and it's gonna be my last thing, but if you don't, if you genuinely don't know, like you don't have anything that that like for us is like music, like we know.

SPEAKER_03 43:04

Right.

SPEAKER_00 43:04

If you don't have that, but you know your heart is surrendered, then just serve. Try things, like figure out where you fit. Right. And you'll find that your heart is uh it might not be everything, but you'll find one thing that your heart is particularly bent to.

SPEAKER_02 43:23

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 43:23

If you don't have, you know, if you don't have a freaking clue, like what do I enjoy? Start figuring that out. Start figuring out, you know, maybe your calling is the preschool ministry. They always need people. Please go surf there. Maybe your calling is um, you know, cooking. And it doesn't even have to be in church. Like, if you don't know what you want to do in your life, go try things. Like, go explore things that you feel like, hey, that might be fun to do, you know, or hey, this might be an interesting career path, or you know, whatever. Not all of us know exactly what it is, what we want to do. But here's the thing: we also have this thing called free will. And as long as we're not doing something unrighteous, God's okay with you being like, I might want to try this. This seems cool. I might want to try this, this seems cool, you know. Case in point, I my passion, music, love it. But I have discovered in my later years that I also enjoy um, you know, working with my hands, like making stuff. I have a home studio fixing stuff at home, not other people's stuff, just mine. Being out in like the yard and and gardening and those kinds of things. I like doing that. I didn't know that I liked doing that. Right. But situations arose that caused me to have to do that. And now I found this is a place that I can go when my mind is very um full and I need to clear my mind. I just get my hands busy and I start doing something with my hands. I found that out later. I enjoy doing that. The same thing is true. Just start trying stuff, just start doing stuff and see you might surprise yourself in what you learn that you like. And it could be that in that you find your direction.

SPEAKER_01 45:13

Doing something is better than doing nothing.

SPEAKER_00 45:15

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 45:15

Find something and do it. And I would challenge you to get plugged in at church. I don't care what ministry you pick. It like you said, maybe you don't know which ministry you're called to, you don't know what to do, get plugged in somewhere. Um, you'd be surprised how deep your faith will grow and how you grow once you get in community. Um, but you may not be called to be a worship pastor on the stage at church. Maybe you're called to run a daycare and take care of someone's children in a in a biblically godly way.

SPEAKER_00 45:47

Or maybe you have the the gift of just reaching strangers and you find through serving at the welcome team, I have a heart for evangelism. You just never know, you know, or maybe you serve cleaning the church, meet someone who has a job opening, and that job opening ends up being the thing that you've wanted to do your whole life, and you just never knew it.

SPEAKER_01 46:12

And I think cleaning the church is the last thing people think of. That's a ministry too. Stepping up and using your hands and helping clean. I mean, anybody can do it. Literally, we've all done it.

SPEAKER_00 46:24

And nobody should ever feel too good. Too good to do it. So just get plugged in somewhere, you know. You'll you never know what you'll find if you don't do anything. But I guarantee you you won't find it sit now.

SPEAKER_01 46:37

Nope. You won't.

SPEAKER_00 46:39

So, anyway, that was my last name. So I'm gonna do that.

SPEAKER_01 46:42

Hope we clarified purpose. Kind of.

SPEAKER_00 46:45

Hope we made it clearer and not muddier. We'll see you guys in the next one.